Tory MP Stewart Jackson went on a vendetta against Sex Education with a remarkable rant on social networking site Twitter. It occurred following figures announcing that there had been a 3% rise in new STI cases in the UK last year. He tweeted ‘Very disappointing new on STD rates in Peterborough. No doubt our Liberal friends will tell us we need more sex education – as it’s worked so well!’ Lowest form of wit Stewey boy but highest form of ignorance. He makes a strong argument, I mean, who can propose a better solution than telling our kids nothing, crossing our fingers and hoping that they don’t stumble upon anyone of the opposite sex. Oh please Stewart, sex education is there to ensure kids are as safe as possible and it shows the importance of protection. I doubt all those pictures they’re shown of mangled and infected genitalia are a great advocate for unprotected sex? But wait, Stewarts got an ace up his sleeve, through incredibly sophisticated language and a strong argument Stewart hits back at those who question his views with a tweet slamming them as ‘sad, tedious sex-obsessed leftie wierdos’. Progressive politics ladies and gentlemen. In another tweet the MP for Peterborough claimed his opponents were ‘unable to debate issues without personal abuse and vicious shrill denunciation’ perhaps because your argument centres around your opinion that those who oppose your views are ‘wierdos’.
No one can get hold of Stewart at the moment as he is away on holiday however his office is aware of his comments. In light of the STI statistics health ministers have said they want to increase young people’s awareness of STIs which contradicts Stewart’s brush-it-under-the-carpet approach, he won’t be too happy.
Sorry Stewart but your wrong on this one; I guess I’m just one of those ‘sad, tedious sex-obsessed leftie wierdos’.
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Monday, 30 August 2010
Friday, 27 August 2010
Our friends at the Mail
I looked up and down my blog, now just 48 hours old and realised something was missing. It was almost as if there was a black hole in the middle of my blog that needed filling. Then I realised what it was, not one blog thanking the cultural heavyweights that are the daily mail. How can we let a paper so rich with information and philosophy have no mention, no its time to give the daily mail its shot in the limelight. This was recently brought to my attention when I read in the mail: 'Big Brother: a Jordan wannabe, two bisexuals, a minister who believes in UFOs... thank god this is the last ever series'. Yes big brother isn't the most thought provoking of programmes and I had to agree with the Mail on this one, they were clearly very pleased that this was the final series and wished to celebrate that fact by by giving it maximum coverage; filling their paper with profiles of each of the contestants, as well as pages of big brother related news and a special daily mail banner dedicated to the new series. Taking into account it's self confessed hatred of big brother it was giving it a mighty fine send off.
However this recent article gives me a nice little excuse to bring up an old story... swine flu (which left us for a summer break last year and doesn't seem to have returned). Oh it was a scary time, when swine flu was in its prime killing people here there and everywhere.....well only people who were already terminally ill, but it was still terrifying. This was not helped with daily mail headlines such as 'swine flu: now its getting serious' and 'swine flu now the battle to contain it' however the headline 'killer flu is here' takes the biscuit for me. so you can imagine by surprise when I read an article in the mail which said 'after this awful fiasco over swine flu, we should never believe the state scare machine again!' wow, just wow. It is quite remarkable that less than a year before the mail had written that '65,000 could die [from swine flu]'. Yes its awful isn't it this scaremongering culture we live in eh Paul Dacre? At least the mail can rise above it with headlines such as 'how using facebook could raise your risk of cancer' and 'food watchdog warning over peanut butter brand containing cancer-causing fungus' and 'artificial light increases breast cancer risk' and 'big headed babies more prone to cancer'. Oh i could go on and on and on....but I won't, because that would be rather tedious and I feel that I've made my point
However this recent article gives me a nice little excuse to bring up an old story... swine flu (which left us for a summer break last year and doesn't seem to have returned). Oh it was a scary time, when swine flu was in its prime killing people here there and everywhere.....well only people who were already terminally ill, but it was still terrifying. This was not helped with daily mail headlines such as 'swine flu: now its getting serious' and 'swine flu now the battle to contain it' however the headline 'killer flu is here' takes the biscuit for me. so you can imagine by surprise when I read an article in the mail which said 'after this awful fiasco over swine flu, we should never believe the state scare machine again!' wow, just wow. It is quite remarkable that less than a year before the mail had written that '65,000 could die [from swine flu]'. Yes its awful isn't it this scaremongering culture we live in eh Paul Dacre? At least the mail can rise above it with headlines such as 'how using facebook could raise your risk of cancer' and 'food watchdog warning over peanut butter brand containing cancer-causing fungus' and 'artificial light increases breast cancer risk' and 'big headed babies more prone to cancer'. Oh i could go on and on and on....but I won't, because that would be rather tedious and I feel that I've made my point
Tuesday, 24 August 2010
The Youth of Today
I’m new to this whole blogging thing, so here it goes:
I know living as a teenager in the UK isn’t such an easy venture these days, everyone assumes you’re either:
• A Drug User
• A Smoker
• An alcoholic
• A criminal
• Or, if all else fails, you’re simply pregnant
Now, I’m sure every teenager (except the drug using, smoking, pregnant criminals of course) will agree with me in saying that they hate being seen in this way most of the time. A first class example of this is public transport, only yesterday I got on the bus, and an elderly lady (bless her heart) decides to put her shopping on her seat so I cannot sit there, as I’m sure you can imagine, this made me angry, so I pulled out my knife and killed her.
Even the BBC are in on this stereotype (the impartial broadcaster, who doesn’t take sides in ANYTHING), I sit here flicking through the channels on Sky (yes, I have sky television, call me upper class and we can continue the discussion), and I come across the trash that is “Young, Dumb, and Living off Mum”. For those of you not aware of this broadcasting genius, it is a group of early twenty year olds, with no job who simply live off their parents who provide their little darlings with cigarettes and alcohol in the hope they’ll end up in a high end job in Central London. The programme then gives the little pumpkins more money to spend on cigarettes and alcohol, and in exchange they work in a café for a couple of hours a day, hoping that they’ll grow up and learn something new in the process, I found it hard to watch and not laugh at a particular blond twenty something who struggled to work a coffee machine, damn caffeine these days, can’t it just be simple?! Then, after the STRUGGLE of a day’s work, they come home to the nice house that the license payer has provided for them in our nation’s capital, and settle down to get royally hammered and throw condoms out the window, and then refuse to clear them out of the neighbour’s garden; curse you condoms for not staying in the place you’re told. No fun for you.
As I can’t bear enough of this stereotypical, mocking programme of British youth, I flick over to the ten o’clock news to hear floods affection millions in Pakistan, and then mudslides in China affecting thousands, and suddenly feel a certain disgust for the western comforts that we, the British youth, are accustomed to. For example, in the past twenty minutes, I’ve complained that a burger is too dry, and that there is a lack of ketchup in the cupboard, now as I see a fifteen year old boy going on sixteen screaming of his mother’s death in floodwaters, and he is left to look after his four brothers and sisters, I wolf down my burger appreciating it to its full potential, and perhaps it’s not totally the end of the world if I go without an oversweet condiment. I feel the guilt plunge into my body like a knife and immediately wonder how the rest of the world can live with themselves after seeing the devastating trouble that mother nature has caused elsewhere, and yet I’m sure Mr Cameron, and Mr Obama will be concentrating more on slamming their opposition into the floor and making sure they cling onto power; that’ll show floodwater!
I decide I can’t bear anymore of the devastation on the ten o’clock news and boot up a new web browser to look for a donation website to the floods and landslides, and then realise that I spent the last of my money on topping up my iTunes library (Steve Jobs beats everyone ladies and gentlemen, even flood victims), and swiftly click away from the site to my Facebook page. Ah, Facebook, the joys. Where the youth of today can post where they’re going, what they’re up to, what a resource! I, for one, rarely post a so called “status” because I don’t care about anyone else’s. I apologise if you’re one of those people who goes “Just watched Inception, was awesome lol rofl :P” because I simply couldn’t care less, I don’t care that you’ve got a new dog or that you’re going to bed or that you had a good holiday. Call me grumpy, and maybe I’m using the thing wrong.
I’m sure by now you’ve realised I see the dark side of things, and are probably considering why I bother writing a blog, the truth is, I get frustrated with the world around us, I get frustrated that people don’t see cultural beauty, or don’t read great works of art. I get frustrated that people instantly call a lesson “boring” and don’t appreciate what they’re being taught and that their only concern is the phone under their desk texting their girlfriend that they “love” (at the age of 15, love is not a reality, it is a mask).
The message is, appreciate what’s around you, and be grateful for what you’ve got. Call me old fashioned, but that’s the way I see the world.
I know living as a teenager in the UK isn’t such an easy venture these days, everyone assumes you’re either:
• A Drug User
• A Smoker
• An alcoholic
• A criminal
• Or, if all else fails, you’re simply pregnant
Now, I’m sure every teenager (except the drug using, smoking, pregnant criminals of course) will agree with me in saying that they hate being seen in this way most of the time. A first class example of this is public transport, only yesterday I got on the bus, and an elderly lady (bless her heart) decides to put her shopping on her seat so I cannot sit there, as I’m sure you can imagine, this made me angry, so I pulled out my knife and killed her.
Even the BBC are in on this stereotype (the impartial broadcaster, who doesn’t take sides in ANYTHING), I sit here flicking through the channels on Sky (yes, I have sky television, call me upper class and we can continue the discussion), and I come across the trash that is “Young, Dumb, and Living off Mum”. For those of you not aware of this broadcasting genius, it is a group of early twenty year olds, with no job who simply live off their parents who provide their little darlings with cigarettes and alcohol in the hope they’ll end up in a high end job in Central London. The programme then gives the little pumpkins more money to spend on cigarettes and alcohol, and in exchange they work in a café for a couple of hours a day, hoping that they’ll grow up and learn something new in the process, I found it hard to watch and not laugh at a particular blond twenty something who struggled to work a coffee machine, damn caffeine these days, can’t it just be simple?! Then, after the STRUGGLE of a day’s work, they come home to the nice house that the license payer has provided for them in our nation’s capital, and settle down to get royally hammered and throw condoms out the window, and then refuse to clear them out of the neighbour’s garden; curse you condoms for not staying in the place you’re told. No fun for you.
As I can’t bear enough of this stereotypical, mocking programme of British youth, I flick over to the ten o’clock news to hear floods affection millions in Pakistan, and then mudslides in China affecting thousands, and suddenly feel a certain disgust for the western comforts that we, the British youth, are accustomed to. For example, in the past twenty minutes, I’ve complained that a burger is too dry, and that there is a lack of ketchup in the cupboard, now as I see a fifteen year old boy going on sixteen screaming of his mother’s death in floodwaters, and he is left to look after his four brothers and sisters, I wolf down my burger appreciating it to its full potential, and perhaps it’s not totally the end of the world if I go without an oversweet condiment. I feel the guilt plunge into my body like a knife and immediately wonder how the rest of the world can live with themselves after seeing the devastating trouble that mother nature has caused elsewhere, and yet I’m sure Mr Cameron, and Mr Obama will be concentrating more on slamming their opposition into the floor and making sure they cling onto power; that’ll show floodwater!
I decide I can’t bear anymore of the devastation on the ten o’clock news and boot up a new web browser to look for a donation website to the floods and landslides, and then realise that I spent the last of my money on topping up my iTunes library (Steve Jobs beats everyone ladies and gentlemen, even flood victims), and swiftly click away from the site to my Facebook page. Ah, Facebook, the joys. Where the youth of today can post where they’re going, what they’re up to, what a resource! I, for one, rarely post a so called “status” because I don’t care about anyone else’s. I apologise if you’re one of those people who goes “Just watched Inception, was awesome lol rofl :P” because I simply couldn’t care less, I don’t care that you’ve got a new dog or that you’re going to bed or that you had a good holiday. Call me grumpy, and maybe I’m using the thing wrong.
I’m sure by now you’ve realised I see the dark side of things, and are probably considering why I bother writing a blog, the truth is, I get frustrated with the world around us, I get frustrated that people don’t see cultural beauty, or don’t read great works of art. I get frustrated that people instantly call a lesson “boring” and don’t appreciate what they’re being taught and that their only concern is the phone under their desk texting their girlfriend that they “love” (at the age of 15, love is not a reality, it is a mask).
The message is, appreciate what’s around you, and be grateful for what you’ve got. Call me old fashioned, but that’s the way I see the world.
The Mystery of the Front Line Service
Now this is a tricky one. Obviously throughout the centuries the English language has changed greatly, meanings and spellings of words have changed a good deal. However I, as I’m sure you have, have noted a more rapid change to the term 'front line service’. This term first came to our attention in the build up to the general election if you remember back that far. All three leaders promised that there would be no cuts to front line services and only efficiency savings. I do not question the trustworthiness of the politicians of course, but am provoking the debate into the reason behind the rapid definition change of this term. At the general election the accepted definition for a front line service seemed to be a policeman or a teacher or the nice people who make soup in hospitals but after plans emerged to cut back on staff in these fields we were politely informed that these were, in fact, not frontline services. Hmm. I guess I then assumed that school buildings would be on the front line? I then felt very embarrassed when the 'Building schools for the future' project was axed which basically makes sure school walls and other school related debris doesn't fall on pupils. I felt this was pretty front line; however I had been corrected again and told by Education Michael Gove that it was most definitely not front line because it was 'wasteful'....whatever that means. I had a deep think and then thought that imprisoning criminals must have been kinda near the front? I was left red faced when Ken Clarke outlined his master plan to 'take action and shut off this revolving door of crime and reoffending' which involved, er......putting less criminals in prison...wow. Number 10 insisted, that this was, of course, not a front line service. So now I am very confused indeed...
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